The latest

29-3-2008 - 16:00

Today after I had been walking to the beach and came back and sat down to work on the forums, K. on purpose "bumped into" me - pushing aside while passing her at the balcony where I was to get some milk for my coffee.
I said nothing, pretended I didn't notice.
But then.........

She started shouting at me. Just like that, without any reason.... "I am waiting for you to burn in hell, just like abba says you will" - "Yella move out of my way, Fathma" - and more curses like that. "Go back to your work, me and abba need you to pay everything, go go" - "So good that A. is not here now I can tell you exactly what I want".

Because she seemed very upset I kept on asking in a calm voice "what happened?" - since this came out of the blue. But she didn't answer just kept on cursing me. Her face was "distorted" as well while doing so.

I cannot take this. I honestly don't want to be afraid of being cursed at without reason anymore. However, I also feel very, very sorry for her. And angry at Isaac. How did he manage to instill so much hatred into this girl? How???

Every time I have to pass him in the house he keeps on repeating "Elisheva, return be-tshuva. I will help you. I know you play tricks to keep A. from returning be-tshuva but you won't succeed, he will return be-tshuva. It is better you don't fight God because soon He will slam you, you'll become blind and very ill." - This over and over and over and over and.... again.... brrrrr.

K. later even entered the room I am keeping myself in and said "just so you know, in hell they observe shabbath". . .

This was my Saturday. No matter how much I try to stay optimistic and hope for the best, they always know how to depress me....

Tomorrow is the surgery on my eyes, I hope and pray they will stay a bit away from me and let me heal in a more relaxing atmosphere.

Exposing.