Pesach 2008 for me *sigh*

Monday April 21st, 2008 - 07:30 AM


After a few times already that K. tried to provoke me into saying something to her insinuations about her grandparents (my parents) and how they should burn in hell according to her and how they are 'nothing' etc. etc. I yesterday told her I feel sorry for her. She kept on sneering at me and saying 'go back to work, quickly.... I have to use electricity and you have to pay for it' and she kept on putting the air conditioner on (no need for it, it wasn't warm at all).... She kept repeating the same over and over again - about how I am working for her and 'her house' etc....

I had drunk Keglovitch (wodka) with orange juice (I find that I am not only not getting 'drunk' from it, I find that I even feel very good the day after I have some glasses of it - lighter, more flexible and overall a better general feeling. Still I have to stop it because I don't think it is healthy. However in my situation where I lost everything I thought was 'mine' forever -or at least until I die- I am not really that worried about that, but more about feeling as good as I can because nobody else cares how I feel).

Anyway I am proud in myself that I didn't go overboard yesterday and got emotional (like I used to do in the past when terrible things were said to me, about me but most of all about her grandparents - people that are dead, where is the respect for the dead?) and stayed cool just telling her I feel sorry for her. Which I do.... God knows my heart is crying for her. There is something terribly wrong in that head of hers and she is like an emotional slave to her father who talked his way into becoming exactly that for years and years and years... I know he will receive punishment for his evilness 'later' when it is his time, but I so much would have liked my daughter not to have fallen for this evilness.....

There is not much I can do about it anymore, however it still hurts to see her that way....


EXPOSING